Boat Jokes...

One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a very Sexy nightie. 'Tie me up,' she purred, 'and you can do anything you want.' So he tied her up and went sailing.

New Batmobile !!

Even Batman has fallen on hard times with this fuel pricing.

He has had to downsize the Batmobile.
He's gone from 70 gallons per mile, to 70 miles per gallon!


.....posted the pic over here as I thought it might be time to inject a little humor into out current fuel price discussions

http://www.yachtforums.com/forums/126119-post362.html

When I was young, I met a great girl.
We were deeply in love and I asked her to marry me.
She accepted and I was elated.
Her folks had a place on the water and I often picked her up in my little speedboat and we would go water skiing.

One day I stopped in to pick her up and go out on the boat.
My future bride was not home but her younger sister was.
The sister was as stunning as my fiance and she was dressed in a little white halter top and shorty shorts.
She said" I know this is wrong but I always wanted to sleep with you.
Once your married we can never do it but if you follow me upstairs now we can use this one last chance."

My knees started to shake and my palms were sweaty and I didn't know what to think.
I turned on my heel and bolted out the door only to be met by my future father-in-law.
With tears in his eys he said " welcome to the family son, you've proved you're worthy of my daughter."

The moral of the story is " always keep your condoms in your little speedboat..........."

Got to jump in!

Some of these are really good. So here goes...and please those of you that are involved with GreenPeace or the like...take a chill pill.

A seal walks into a bar in Toronto and jumps up onto the bar stool. Bar tender walks over and asks, "what'll have"! The seal replies, "anything but a Canadian Club".

Definitely not PC, but humorous.

How Many Forum Posters

Borrowed from another forum so of course this isn't applicable to YF

How many forum posters does it take to change a light bulb?*

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the
light bulb could have been changed differently
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb"
Another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"
15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light
bulb" is perfectly correct
19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take
this discussion to a light bulb forum
11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light
bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum
36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to
buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this
technique and what brands are faulty
5 People to post pics of their own light bulbs
15 People to post "I can't see S$%^!" and their own light bulbs
7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs
4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the
corrected URL's
13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all
headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot
handle the light bulb controversy
4 to say "Didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
13 to say "Do a search on light bulbs before posting questions about
light bulbs"
1 to bring politics into the discussion by adding that Barak O. isn't
the brightest bulb.
4 more to get into personal attacks over their political views.
1 moderator to lock the light bulb thread.
1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and
start it all over again.

RU referring to incandescents, LEDs or.....

light bulbs

Banned for illegal posting of potentially advertising "light Bulbs over LED lights.

I'll put it on my calendar to make sure I remember to do this.

Hi,

While we are including Marine Animals in this thread here is one about a penguin.

A penguin is cruising along the interstate when suddenly steam and all erupts out of the front of his car. Luckily there's a garage just a bit further on, so he pulls in and the garage guy comes out to take a look at the car.

While he's busy checking out what's wrong, the penguin wanders off to get a snack. It has to be said he's a bit of a messy eater (what with the beak and flippers and all).

Anyway, he comes back to the damaged car after a while, and the guy says: "Whoa, looks like you've blown a seal!"

"Nah," says the penguin, "this is just vanilla ice cream..."

Horrifying Sight


What is that?

Scroll down for the horrifying answer

At the airport, Murphy sets his i-Phone to airplane mode.

With great effort, he threw it as hard as he could into the air.

As it crashed onto the tarmac in little bits, he turns to Paddy and says.......

"Thats the worst Transformer EVER....."!!!!!!

Oldie; but a goodie

Gee, I thought you were referencing this old link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CCuoLd0K4lY

Actually, that was my second thought.

My first thought, after seeing the laptops and the look of discontent on Obama's face, was this little Internet alteration, that perhaps someone had downloaded for testing the room's Internet connection prior to the actual event.

High curbs ...

not a boat joke, but hilarious ...

couldn't resist ...

FYI, we have been talking about this over here...
http://www.yachtforums.com/forums/yachtforums-yacht-club/16304-how-big-curbs-georgia.html

[QUOTE='roundthehorn]FYI, we have been talking about this over here...
http://www.yachtforums.com/forums/yachtforums-yacht-club/16304-how-big-curbs-georgia.html[/QUOTE]

oops ...

The look of Certitude - The cat's out of the bag.

A New Yorker whose ship just sunk in the harbor.

I'm still waiting for that repub who got caught picking up boys in the airport men's room and the other messing with pages a few year ago to quit. So I wouldn't hold my breath. It does seem that only one party quits when caught with their pants down though.

That is a highly accurate summary. The only thing missing was Nazis.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godwin's_law